Part Two of Three
This collection of beautiful quotes that will inspire you to discover and embrace the joy of giving is extracted from Masami Sato...
Part Two of Three
This collection of beautiful quotes that will inspire you to discover and embrace the joy of giving is extracted from Masami Sato’s second book – “ONE”. Masami is the founder of a global giving movement called Buy1GIVE1. The quotes in this edition include topics that are related to our everyday lives, such charity, giving, receiving, joy, making a difference and rich-poor separation. This article is the second part of three “ONE Book Life-Changing Quotes Series”.
On giving (and receiving)
“When we give more and communicate wholeheartedly, we have less insecurity-both emotionally and physically.”
“Giving love is the only way to be generously loved.”
“The people who give more (time, money, kindness, love, ideas) have more of these things because that’s the balance. And balance is the natural law of life.”
“one key in the giving process is never to expect a return when we give.”
“We can feel the real joy of giving when we’re doing something for others knowing that we’re simply doing it for ourselves-we’re doing it for our own joy.”
“Giving something to others is so much easier than trying to get it first.”
“Giving is just a part of who we are.”
“Every single one of us prospers when we learn to give value to others first. We are rewarded naturally.”
“We’re not here to give in order ‘to get’. We’re here to have more to give more.”
“Because we can’t have scarcity when we are totally grateful.”
“Giving to others is actually giving to self.”
“What if giving actually was as important as brushing teeth?”
“Giving is not just about helping others. It is about sharing the joy. We do it for our own joy first and we pass it on.”
On joy
“So without denying the benefit of having more innovation (because it feels good), can we find the way to have more joy in our life? If we can, then we can go beyond the temporal gratification. We can create a sense of permanent certainty.”
On charity
“Charity organisations are like our out-sourcing agencies for the giving of our life.”
“Businesses and charities are actually the same thing. Someone started the organisation with the passion to do something-to make a difference.”
“The moment we start giving out of guilt, we appreciate charities far less.”
On having more or having less
“The moment we perceive someone as ‘poor’, our perception creates the poor feeling in the other person.”
“The moment we believe we have more, we’re saying others have less. And OUR attitude creates separation.”
On making a difference
“Big is nothing other than a whole lot of ’smalls’. Small things can actually transform the world.
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When the global financial market is in turmoil the first thing most people think of doing is holding onto things and cutting expenditure. And they automatically assume (because the newspapers tell them) that everyone is acting that way.
However, each and every person ISN’T doing so. There are sections of the society which prosper, come what may. Those, who feel surprised about this odd equation, can find the clue for it in a most obvious place where they might have missed it. It might be worthwhile to analyse it together.
When a ‘down’ current comes, no matter what it is, the most effective solution is to rise above it. When we go with the down current we sink with the tide and have to wait, suffocating, until the tide changes.
The reality is that when we learn how to be in control and in our power, we can stay above everything that is happening no matter what happens around us. Let’s take a look at how.
‘Go-getters’ or ‘Go-contributors’
Imagine a scenario where we want to have more – better profits, a higher salary, more leave, better liberty, and wider chances.
When we want something, the first thing we tend to do is to go and get it. So, we call ourselves ‘Go-getters’. And being a ‘go-getter’ is, let’s face it, a sign of leadership, activism and an early-adopter mindset. This is of course one of the keys to the success formulae we often read about. But there is a problem. It turns out that when we use this ’strategy’, there are some unexpected (but quite predictable) consequences.
The gist of the matter is that after ‘getting’ and ‘possessing’ it we tend to ‘get rid of’ it. We might actually jettison it or might become apathetic to the whole idea.
And when we are tired of one thing we concentrate on getting something new. And these fresh cravings never end. The more we go in search of newer things, the wider the chain of desire that makes us continuously yearn for things. It simply becomes an addiction!
So what if we turned our ‘desire to get’ into a desire to provide?
Most of you are aware that the act of providing gives a sense of fulfillment. This ensues from gratefulness and not from panic or avarice. A person can go on providing more and receive more and know full satisfaction in the voyage of life.
Our abundant and providing attitude creates abundant and providing clients and team mates while our cost awareness and ‘getting approach’ would draw towards us only similar clients and team mates. And those are the type of people we would not like to be friends with!
Creative capitalism
Most ventures are today aware of the inspiring role of capitalism. They are ever ready to contribute more through many avenues. The idea has strongly impacted the business world as they realise how giving is central to business interests. A typical example is Bill Gates, who expounded the philosophy of ‘Creative Capitalism’ in July 2008 in a TIME magazine article.
He opined that the idea of providing for others could become a crucial factor in encouraging people to buy one product rather than another.
What he’s actually saying is that when a company links its business to giving in some way, that company and its products become more attractive to customers. It takes us way, way above what’s been called ‘the sea of sameness’.
Creative Capitalism is about rising above what we reluctantly settle for to reach what we truly aspire to. When we can capitalise on our ideas and imagination in a way that benefits and nurtures the wider community and network; we stop wasting our resources, efforts and talents in trying to temporarily win. We start creating the real win for ourselves and for the sustainability of our global economy.
The attraction of effective giving
Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) is the phrase that’s often used to describe giving back at a corporate level. It’s becoming almost a required part of corporate business practice. Yet when it’s done out of a sense of obligation or with the intent to just make ourselves look good, people eventually get what it is. It still is a temporary strategy.
Individuals and enterprises that ‘contribute’, appeal to everyone. Their fervour and conviction about what they do are acknowledged by the people with whom they build up relationships. This acknowledgement is in addition to the official public relations campaign of the establishment.
What would be the result if part of the amount that is meant for marketing is diverted towards charity?
Giving gives rise to something greater than what we actually are. It has the power to inspire. And true inspiration is possible only when it echoes on the people whom we want to enthuse. And we are enthused only when we put our heart and soul into the procedure. It is simply not sufficient to listen to the interesting tales. One has to become part and parcel of the whole process. Everyone has this inclination to make one’s own input – to one’s immediate relatives, friends, and to the society at large.
Transaction-based giving causes it to happen on its own
The ability to give just got so much easier too, thanks to an initiative (some would say a ‘movement’) called Buy1GIVE1 (Buy One Give One). Buy1GIVE1 is the home of transaction-based giving. Transaction-based giving changes everything. Let’s use some imagination to see why.
For example, imagine if every time you had a cup of coffee at your favourite cafe, a child in Africa automatically got access to pure, clean water for one day?
Imagine if every time you subscribed to a magazine you love, a tree got planted automatically just because you bought the magazine? Or every time you dine out, you fed a child in need? Automatically again.
Or let’s say you’re being coached in your business. How interesting would it be to know that a child was educated for one month as a direct result (and by the way, all it cost the coaching company to do that was 60 cents per day).
Where a motivational speaker at a conference is connected with a charity, part of his income might go to helping kids who have speech problems due to facial defects. It will be a matter of great satisfaction for the participants at the conference to know that their very participation is helping a deserving cause.
Imagine the perfect scenario where transaction-based giving can be applied in one’s own special manner to correspond with the available products and services to include every member of the group and customers. It is possible.
The economy where all benefits
Business ventures, on a global basis, have already internalized the efficacy of this transaction-based giving. A case in point is TESCO, one of the foremost supermarket chains of UK. The company’s programme ensures that a Kenyan child gets a school uniform when someone buys a pair of school trousers from them.
Volvic is a Mineral Water Company that launched its scheme of transaction-based giving program last year. They help the cause of making wells in Africa. They call the scheme Buy1 GIVE 10 as it helps in generating a flow of 10 litres of water in the well, by every single litre of water they sell.
Middle level and comparatively small enterprises are now in the forefront in widening this global giving phenomenon through Creative Capitalism. Buy1GIVE1 (www.b1g1.com), a Singapore-based Social Enterprise came up with an effective strategy which has turned this transaction-based giving into a movement that anyone who wants can participate in.
Buy1GIVE1 is the home of the most impactful transaction-based giving in the world because it connects any business of any size to any cause in the world. It’s creating a global community of business givers and for SME`s, Buy1GIVE1 connects businesses, their customers AND charities in a way that hasn’t been done before. And it all happens automatically.
You can enroll yourself as a citizen of this marvel of universal giving by simply getting a Buy1GIVE1 `VISA` directly from the Buy1GIVE1 site at www.b1g1.com. And if you are an entrepreneur, you can become a B1G1 Business through making an online application and choosing the requirement for which you would like to donate and your product or service through which you would prefer to do it to initiate the giving. Buy1GIVE1 forwards the whole of the donation to their international Worthy Cause Partners (with more than 528 projects to choose) making the giving entirely satisfactory.
Are you aware?
* One half of the world’s population -which is about three billion people-does not have a daily income of even two dollars.
* Even in the 21st century, which is the age of the internet, there are about a billion people who have never put a pen to a paper.
* UNICEF has reported that more than 30,000 children die every day due to abject poverty, which makes it 20 child a minute and 210,000 a week.
* Just 12% of the people worldwide utilize 85% of the water available for human consumption. And this 12% does not belong to any of the underdeveloped countries.
* About a billion people have no access to minimum health care facilities.
* Every year about 63,000 square miles of rainforests get decimated.
* Medical practice providing healthcare (www.primanora.com)
* Phone card to human interaction (www.ultimatecomms.com)
* Mind Expansion to curing (www.meditate.com.au)
* Weight loss to kids’ meals (www.bodychain.com)
* Blind installation to lighting up schools (www.blindscouture.com.au)
* Socks for protecting feet from frostbite (www.socksforhappypeople.com)
* Coaching to train social entrepreneurs (www.b1g1forcoaches.com)
* And to get a complete picture, just go to www.b1g1.com.
Unearthing what we are looking for-Nature’s eternal secret
So let’s come back to where we started-economic turmoil and getting what we want. What we all really want is actually very simple. You can sum it up with ‘C’ words – connection, collaboration and community.
When we can pool resources and not segregate and when we can divine a proper way to augment what everyone has got and not cut down from what each has got, we understand that there is a veritable cornucopia of sources to be had in the world. And when we bond, not just with our physical persona, but with our intrinsic selves, we discern something completely fascinating -that we’re all ONE. Then we comprehend how uncomplicated it is to form a universal community from something as ordinary as giving.
And the truth is there in all its glory in nature.
In nature, bees and butterflies pollinate flowers and create sustainable flower gardens for many generations to thrive on. It’s been in front of us all along!
Failures are said to be stepping stones to success. In the same way we can turn setbacks into advantages. In reality we should be thankful for the current situation that is helping us to move ahead.
And when a person chooses to donate now itself, in spite of the financial crisis, he will feel more contended. And with this contentment he will find a hope that is rekindled anew, which will ring a bell on how the ebb and flow of things can change. Today’s charity might be that which will reverse the flow.
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The origins of tithing can be traced to the Bible, still it is customary among many non-Christians as well as Christians to do some kind of tithing today.
Tithe is conventionally a Christian term that signifies the contribution of one tenth of one’s earnings as donation to one’s Church as a type of Church giving. However, every other religious system has similar practices within itself. In Islam the word used is ‘Zakat’. In the Sikh religion of India the name for it is ‘Dasvandh’ which again signifies setting apart a tenth of one’s earnings for pious acts. It was Guru Gobind Singh, the tenth Sikh guru who started the practice. The sacred texts of Hinduism like the Bhagavadgita and the Upanisads state that ‘true alms’ is that which is given as a part of one’s duty in the right place and at the right time to a worthy individual, from whom nothing is expected in return.
The word tithe is derived from the Hebrew word ‘asair’, which means to give the tenth part of something, often of a person’s income. Today, tithes (or tithing) are normally voluntary and paid in cash. However, there are still European countries that allow the church to mandate tithing and enforce it by law.
Denmark is a case where the Church of Denmark members have to pay a church tax, which is different in different municipalities. It is commonly about 1% of a person’s taxable income. The situation is similar in Finland where members of state churches have to pay a tax which can be anything between 1% and 2.25% of income and these taxes form a part of the common national taxation system.
Anyway the custom of regular tithes was not instituted until after Exodus. Tithes were popular all across the Near East in olden days, as well as in later Lydia, Carthage and Arabia.
The Hebrew custom of giving tithes finds mention in the Bible, starting with the gift from Abraham to Melchizedek, the Canaanite king and priest (Genesis–:20). Tithing was also common in former Lydia, Carthage and Arabia. The practice of tithing was espoused by the early Christian church, and was discussed in councils at Tours in 567 and at Macon in 585. Formal recognition to these was given under Pope Adrian I in 787.
Tithing in certain Christian churches is a disputed issue as it deals with an Old Testament process to a New Testament institution (the Church). There is no proof in the New Testament that tithing can be applied to Christians. In fact, it was obligatory only on those Jews who were living in the Promised Land to pay the tithe according to the Old Testament, as it was in reality a form of income tax required to support not just the government of the Israel of the Old Testament, but also its religious institutions and priests.
Current day Tithing
Despite the fact that it has originated in the Bible and earliest Christianity, now it is a unique way to gift something whenever you are given something. Giving EVERY time you are in receipt is a compelling form of giving as it allows the benefactor to experience something exceptionally eloquent – more on that later.
Let us have a little more of history. Malachi 3:10 is the section of the Bible that Christians hold in importance when they deliberate on tithing. Many Christians do tithe to their church as they feel that they are duty bound to do as per the rules of the Bible. Many Churches have all throughout maintained that their members should tithe to the church to help it conduct its activities. The core of giving is its voluntary nature and its delightful experience, without which it does not get its ideal effect – if in fact you are hoping to create an ideal effect by giving.
Conflicting Views about Tithing
Tithing has often been a controversial subject.The question of should a Christian pay tithe is often raised in many Christian circles.
In a Wall Street Journal article about tithing titled ‘The Backlash Against Tithing’, Suzanne Sataline writes, ‘As Churches push donations, congregants balk; ‘that’s not the way God works’.’
Regrettably, the different ideological perspectives, desire to dominate, and a narrow outlook, can lead to a Jekyll and Hyde scenario – the pure goodness of giving being lost in the fog and misinterpretation of religion. In spite of the disputes, tithing is still a fully and marvellously powerful act that any person can do to turn around their lives to face a fuller pathway.
For those who are interested in finding out more about a Christian perspective in tithing there are plenty of materials to go through. For those who are keen on knowing the reason WHY tithing is so compelling, what follows will be useful.
Why is Tithing so powerful?
This is indeed a powerful question because if you just mindlessly follow something without knowing some key background pointers you may be heading in the wrong direction.
If more people who are in the habit of tithing knew exactly why it works when done with the feeling of total giving, then it is likely to make people eager to give even more. And for those who do it intermittently, it could encourage them to give first every time they are in receipt of something.
To analyse the real ‘why’ of how routine giving leads to more we have to understand something about Quantum Mechanics and Quantum Physics. The laws of these realms vary a lot from that of our own material or Newtonian world.
The film ‘What the Bleep’ explains the quantum world through examples that can be understood by the layman. The link below explains things about how matter turns into waves and acts like fluids when viewed through a quantum physics lens: http://video.yahoo.com/watch/1349535/4653525.
The movie paints the picture of a startling world visible from a quantum space. When a line of electrons is fired through a plate with a cut in it onto a wall – predictably, it would hit the wall straight across the cut in a single line.
If you repeat the experiment but this time using an energy wave that behaves very much like a water wave would do you get a predictable result. As the wave hits the plate it bounces off the place but where the slit exists some of the wave goes through the slit. On the other side of the slit the wave opens out in an arc fashion forming a new wave just like the old experiments you would have done at science school with waves patterns. As the wave hits the wall it hits with the most intensity in the middle right opposite the slit then hits with less intensity all along the wall. This is similar to the line the electrons make.
If we created one more opening in the plate, again the upshot would not be totally unexpected while experimenting a wave – two smaller waves would be formed through the openings and when the waves come into contact, they would dissolve each other and make an intervention pattern. Many waves would now strike the wall across, giving a stripped effect. These are standard patterns of wave behaviour and so there is nothing unexpected in the result.
Here is where the whole experiment takes on an entirely different direction. When electrons are sent through the two cuts in the plate, what should ordinarily result are two lines in the wall opposite. On the contrary what one sees is a stripped appearance with an intersecting pattern. This is unbelievable. The matter seems to have been turned into a wave. We can perhaps imagine that electrons were hitting against each other and ricocheting and causing a wave pattern; so if electrons are sent across separately the result should be different. But it is not, it is the same. The explanation has to be that the electron leaves as a single particle, and splits into a wave on collision with the plate, then goes across through the cuts and intervenes with itself after that on the other side. This idea of solid having fluid properties -or mattering acting like a wave – is totally surprising. The world is much more than we understand it to be.
Though the overall properties of the world appear to be solid in nature, it does seem that it has enough of properties of a liquid as well – flux or liquid energy, which behaves like fluids in the physical world. The laws of physics clearly state that liquids that are alike in nature are attracted towards each others, while those which are unlike each other has a tendency to segregate and form its own group. The ineffective combining of water and oil is an example of this. Chromatography shows clearly the dispersion in clear bands of one substance into the many substances of which it is made of, just like larger collections of human beings split into smaller groups of people sharing common passions, strengths and interests.
The key is that when we give we feel joyful and experience joy. As a giver we receive the most divine gifts of all the gift of joy. Often we think that it is the receiver of a gift that receives something and it often overlooked that the giver actually is the greatest receiver. If you’re not too sure about this, then watch yourself around children and see how you feel when you give to them and observe how you feel no matter how they respond.
When we appreciate that we are actually giving to ourselves when we give and that we do this because we want to feel satisfied then we have an answer. This answer unlocks the door of cognizance to giving. And when we give again and again the impetus builds up just like a swelling wave that grows larger the more we put in to it with our idea of our bountifulness.
The truth that we feel happy when we gift things alters our power equation fully – we feel good and in that moment we are lovelier to others. Have you ever known a vendor on the street peddling things that we do not want like tissues, which you usually do not buy, but one day you buy and the motive for doing it is just to see that vendor happy and relieved? A similar situation could be seen in relations to buskers playing music at a street corner.
A happy person exudes a natural warmth that attracts others to him and in doing so he becomes rich in life’s lessons. It is so easy. They draw to them those who have never known that sensation and so want to feel it, or even those who have fully known the pleasures of that feeling.
Exactly like water and oil, those who give and those who do not give are compartmentalised in different groups. And the ideal place where one can receive something is there where givers congregate! But you can remain in that group only as long as you gift things! Givers enjoy giving to others who give.
So even though we can run to quantum physics for our answers, they also lie right in front of our face. Like attracts like – simple. Everywhere you look you see this happening. Lions hand out with lions, students hang out with students, women hang out with women, guys hang out with guys, ‘poor’ people hang out with ‘poor’ people and ‘rich’ people hang out with ‘rich’ people. And yes – givers hang out with givers.
So if you give from a sense of self-reproach then it will only boomerang on you – you will just attract to you like-minded others who have a guilt complex and cannot be contented and delighted. The borderline between remorse and anger is narrow; so people gifting things out of a sense of guilt tend to turn in that direction. Joy is one of the highest of human emotions – and from there one can only turn to love – and that is what all of us are forever searching for.
So when you start giving you are two steps away from love – pretty amazing to think that isn’t it. Especially seeing most people are desperately seeking love. Now we know the answer is simple – go get giving! And of course giving money is just a small part of giving – giving in general will create a space of joy for us, no matter how ’small’.
There is also an emotional aspect to giving consistently. This aspect might not in the beginning appear to have connections to the sensation of joy – in the end it completely bonds us to the absolute bliss of joy.
When we give something – especially something we don’t feel we have much of – then we send a powerful signal to our brain that life can be trusted. When we give something and later on we look back and we observe that all worked out well we connect with trust. The opposite of trust is fear. So again, a party of fearful people would not be a happy and joyful one so their attraction point would be pretty darn low. However, a party of trusting people would be a joyful experience and would attract others seeking that experience. So in the end when we trust it converts to joy and again we are only one step away from the number one thing that most of us are seeking – love.
So the gist of what has been overlooked for years is right in front of us for any one to build a relationship with it with ease. My son got a lot of cash for Christmas and I enquired how he was going to spend it. He said he was going to put aside much of it. I asked him how much he would like to share. He had not even thought of it as a possibility until I gave the idea to him. What is likely to happen if our first response to getting something was to give something away – is it likely that we will know more of happiness?
Transaction based charity – or transaction based generosity
This takes us to the force of transactional giving. Many enterprises give when they have enough of money to give. When they do not have much they do not prefer to give. So their possible levels of joy fluctuate depending upon market variations – they do not have any restraint. But whoever gives EVERY time they get something is in charge and has their relationship with perfect joy forever.
Transactional giving rather than single payments is connected with the ups and downs of profit so it is an easy way of giving. The rule is that whenever you get something you give proportionately – easy. If you have a bad season you might give, but less depending on sales. And when business is better one can give more.
A key factor of transaction based venture is that a person can celebrate the joy of giving mutually with everyone involved – clientele/commune – personnel – and venture itself. A customer knows that when he buys from a business he is giving without having to expend anything other than the time to select and buy from that outlet he experiences the power of giving – reason for the conventional CSR – Corporate Social Responsibility, to change instantly to Customer Social Responsibility, with the ability of the customer to effectively respond to the sharing by valuing the venture and have that added sensitive though subtle reason, for opting to do business with the venture.
Your personnel will also be able to partake in the happiness of giving as every time they manage to close a sale, they realise that they have managed to give something to a needy person. This is an extremely satisfying experience especially in a team as it can get converted into motivating the team and encouraging the staff.
Any commercial transaction, including profitless ventures, can do Buy1GIVE1 transaction-based giving – there are absolutely no prohibition to entering and the business decides most of it. The charity amount per operation starts from just a single cent and rises up to any amount of dollars with each venture choosing his or her own level of donating and giving to help and support completely based upon their business type and productivity. There is absolutely no reason to refuse to donate in this manner when the advantages of giving are so endless. Commercial ventures that are presently giving to a purpose can change very fast and without difficulty to Buy1GIVE1 transaction-based giving while continuing to support the same issue delivering more visible results to their enterprise.
At the end of the day commercialised giving is the current day reincarnation of tithing that is simple and manageable for any person, anywhere. Now that we recognize that it is not about the amount that we give such as a specific percentage, but only about the fact that we are giving that is making all that effect. When we enter the brotherhood of givers we move into a restricted and exclusive world that only those who give can enter. And if you do not begin giving today, you may not ‘get’ giving and never will till you begin. So get going.
‘We’re not here to donate to ‘get back.’. We’re here to give more and more.
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A new development is revolutionizing many lives in the hamlets of India by bringing brightness where there used to be blackness.
The New York Times published a piece named, “Husk Power for India”. Power, which is common in the lives of most in advanced countries, is a rare bonus in far-flung areas of underdeveloped countries. What was once cattle feed is now used to generate power – rice husks.
Growing up in rural Bihar State, Manoj Sinha knew what it was like to sit in the dark. Being an engineer with Intel Corporation he had all the skills to make a lifelong idea come alive. He led the development of his electricity equipment that generates power from rice husks and other farming waste and now he sells it to villages across India.
Sinha is what could be called a social entrepreneur because he feels business is a solution to key social issues. “Business leaders must realise that the world’s poor need investments more than handouts,” he says, adding, “these are customers, not victims.”
The article motivated me to think about offering things in a different way that made me ask myself, “what is the most perfect form of giving?” Is it edification, commerce or disaster aid? There are so many ways to create a difference. One way of giving can seem more productive or practical than other ways depending on the way it is given expression, viewed or put into practice.
I then came to define there were eight parts to giving as a way to look at this. So, let me map out the eight distinctions; which in effect are often ’stages’ of giving as well.
Stage one: Necessity – saving and helping others who are afflicted by natural catastrophe, contagious diseases or other unmanageable conditions.
Stage two: Relief – providing relief from long-standing hunger, poverty, diseases, handicaps or discrimination which otherwise would continue or worsened because of the lack of information, education or resources.
Stage three: Healing and protection – mentally, physically and emotionally. Many people carry traumas that may be invisible but severely limiting their lives. Giving the healing to release the deep-rooted pain creates more opportunities for them while giving suitable protection gives them a sense of security.
Stage four: Training – giving better training, knowledge and skill instruction to create empowered and practical solutions to resource creation while encouraging people to identify their singular talent to survive.
Stage five: Inspired investment – giving a help, capital or resources to those who have great talent to alter the situation. This gets used many times as the resources become more and passed on to other people who again produce more out of the prospects given.
Stage six: Tenability – working together with the people in the local surroundings, creating tenable groups – ambiance-wise and reciprocally.
Stage seven: Empowerment – empowering and inspiring the people to unleash their true potential and motivation to make a difference. In this group of giving, the aim of giving changes from ‘giving to the people who are in need’ to ‘giving people opportunity to give to others’ and to the community.
Stage eight: Loving – just doing whatever we feel to do to love and care for others. No strategy or expected outcome exists in this stage of giving. ‘Giving’ does not even exist here in the traditional sense of the word, as there is no sense of possession or judgment or desire to change anything. This is where we do not even have to think about anything, we give as a part of our own joyful experience.
What we also perceive is that at each one of these eight stages of giving there are distinctive things that the donor gets back.
One: Sense of bonding
Two: Sense of comfort
Three: Relief from pain (our own)
Four: Gratification for our own understanding, talents and situations
Five: Long-term sense of involvement and fulfillment for our own life
Six: Better ambiance for our own life and for the lives of others we treasure and revere
Seven: Soul gratifying encouragement and devotion to our own purpose
Eight: Affection
Giving has many planes and understandings upon the basis of the giver and the beneficiary. And the ‘levels’ do not explain which one is higher than the other. All are imperative.
I was gifted with an experience early in 2008 while travelling with a group of dedicated entrepreneurs through India to see how we could be more effective in our giving. I was blessed to have one particular experience that made me think about what ‘effective giving’ really meant.
We were in a small town one day. Four of us had just called a taxi to take us to another town in the vicinities. We bargained with the driver with care as our hotel staff had told us beforehand that we could be duped since we were not local.
We halted briefly in front of the local train station for a short recess on the way. While the others went to use the restroom, I tried to chat with our taxi driver standing near his vehicle. With his limited knowledge of English and a wonderful smile that showed his blackened front teeth, he told me that he had a house on the suburbs of the town and he had a sweet wife and two lovely kids who went to the local school – I felt a strong bonding with him.
I congratulated him on having such a loving family and told him that I also had two children similar ages to his. When the others returned he spontaneously invited us to come to his house for lunch. I thought it was just a friendly courtesy he wanted to show at first. However, after dropping us off in the town centre, he insisted that he would wait for us until we finished our exploration in town. And he did. I was actually quite surprised to see him still waiting at the side of the road standing next to his taxi more than hour later. We jumped back into the taxi and he zoomed off up the road to where his family lived.
When we reached there we were really quite taken aback to see how he was living. It was more or less similar (if not worse) to the standard of people dwelling in slums we had visited before. From the gleaming new taxi he was driving, who could have thought this
As the car turned into the narrow unsealed road between the hut-like houses that were constructed with crudely made concrete blocks and painted mud walls, we felt contrite about having agreed to his invitation. For a brief moment I felt mortified. “How could I have exploited the generosity of a man who didn’t seem to have anything and I didn’t even get any edible stuff or presents for his family”, I thought.
As we walked into his house, we saw a pan and small stove on the mud floor. His very shy wife nodded blushing in surprise and disappeared into the small storeroom (a cupboard size) next to it. As I looked in, I saw the next-door neighbours handing over some teacups to his wife over the crumbled concrete fence. They didn’t even have extra teacups in their house. There was only one small room fitted out with one single bed and an old galvanised chest next to it.
The taxi driver quickly pulled out three hand-woven rugs from the chest and rolled them out on the small patch of mud floor putting one on the bed.
Soon the cups of tea and some snacks arrived. All his children and children from the neighborhood came to see us and stood in the doorway. All six of us were totally squashed in the tiny room. I curiously asked him where all his children were sleeping. I thought they probably had another space somewhere. To my surprise, he cheerfully pointed the chest and said it was their bed with his beaming smile.
He happily told us that he was an amateur dancer in the town and showed us some plaques on the sill above the bed. Enthusiastic to show us his dancing proficiency, he ran outside all at once. From somewhere music came flowing into the tiny room. He had no apparatus for music within the house, it was coming from outside. Surprised, I looked around to see him reversing his vehicle towards the back of his house keeping the doors open with the radio of the car blaring forth!
The time quickly passed (dancing together and having more cups of tea) and it was finally time to say thank you for their great hospitality and head on our way. As we stood up to leave and thank him and his wife, he reached to the best looking rug on the bed, rolled it up and handed it to us. It was one of the only few things he had. I could not believe he offered it to us.
We all respectfully refused his gift and came out saying goodbye to everyone waving at us. We got perplexed about this whole thing. Should we have offered some cash to the family as they obviously had limited means? Should we have agreed to take his wonderful gift?
As I was thinking about this soul-lifting happening a few days afterwards, I was wondering about refusing his gift. He looked quite dejected that we didn’t agree to take the gift. It wasn’t only the fact of declining the gift that crossed my mind.
I realised that the sense of discomfort I felt was actually coming from perceiving him as less fortunate. I was thinking that I couldn’t possibly take anything from someone who had so little.
But did he really have nothing much? Maybe he had much more – many more.
Maybe the real present we could have given him then was to receive his present in utmost deference and thankfulness.
All actions of gifting and getting are essential for us to fill our world with plenty and contentment equally for both giver and getter. We can begin doing this instead of assessing and defending one over the other. The perfect act of gifting and getting needs no further clarification.
Manoj Sinha’s words continue to reverberate in my mind, “these are customers, not victims.” I can picture the happy faces of the rural folk who are now pleased to have power in their hamlets and the kids who now can read books and happily do their homework at night.
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categories: business giving,charity giving,religion,giving,BOGO,cause marketing,charity,marketing,giving money
These inspiring and beautiful quotes on the joy of giving are excerpted from “ONE – Sharing the joy of giving”, a book by Masami Sato. The quotes in this 2nd edition include topics that are profoundly relate to our lives, such as giving, making a difference, receiving, joy, charity and rich-poor separation.
On giving (and receiving)
“What if giving actually was as important as brushing teeth?”
“Giving love is the only way to be generously loved.”
“one key in the giving process is never to expect a return when we give.”
“one key in the giving process is never to expect a return when we give.”
“We can feel the real joy of giving when we’re doing something for others knowing that we’re simply doing it for ourselves-we’re doing it for our own joy.”
“Because we can’t have scarcity when we are totally grateful.”
“Giving something to others is so much easier than trying to get it first.”
“What if giving actually was as important as brushing teeth?”
“we’re not here to give in order ‘to get’. We’re here to have more to give more.”
“Because we can’t have scarcity when we are totally grateful.”
“Giving is just a part of who we are.”
“Giving something to others is so much easier than trying to get it first.”
“Every single one of us prospers when we learn to give value to others first. We are rewarded naturally.”
On simple joy
“So without denying the benefit of having more innovation (because it feels good), can we find the way to have more joy in our life? If we can, then we can go beyond the temporal gratification. We can create a sense of permanent certainty.”
On charity and giving
“charity organisations are like our out-sourcing agencies for the giving of our life.”
“Businesses and charities are actually the same thing. Someone started the organisation with the passion to do something-to make a difference.”
“Businesses and charities are actually the same thing. Someone started the organisation with the passion to do something-to make a difference.”
Having more or having less
“The moment we perceive someone as ‘poor’, our perception creates the poor feeling in the other person.”
“The moment we believe we have more, we’re saying others have less. And OUR attitude creates separation.”
On making a difference in life
“Big is nothing other than a whole lot of ’smalls’. Small things can actually transform the world.
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